Are You Quick to Forgive — Like God?

September 12, 2012 in Life, Parenting, Personal Growth with 4 Comments

You know you should. Forgive, that is. You know you should do it. And quick. You even know you should ask God to forgive you. Like, now.

Yet somehow sinful pride so often holds us back, making our lives even more of a complicated mess.

photo: seantoyer

My son models this call of being quick to forgive and to ask for forgiveness — for any perceived offense. Sometimes he’s too zealous in his request, even asking others to forgive him for thoughts he had about them but never shared with them. Awkward. But good.

I’d rather he be too quick to forgive and request forgiveness than become hardened to sin like most of the rest of us.

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you. (Eph. 4:32 NKJV)

We are called by God to imitate his lead on this forgiveness thing. As we look at His example, what do we see that might give us a plan for being quick to forgive?

  • God is eager to forgive. First, the facts: “The Lord is merciful and gracious, Slow to anger, and abounding in mercy.” (Ps. 103:8 NKJV) It’s as if it’s overflowing out of Him. So often we visualize God as a grudge-holding manipulator whose happy to finally have us at a disadvantage when we stumble — can you say “Projecting!” That’s what we do. But not God. In truth, He is always poised to pounce at the slightest opening to forgive all who ask. Is that the ready-and-waiting condition of your heart today?
  • God forgives quickly. “If we confess our sins…he will forgive our sins….” (1 John 1:9 NKJV) There’s no time-delay with God. There’s no committee to review the request. There’s no standing in line. No weighing of the leverage He has over us. Forgiveness is instant — like that powdered stuff they call coffee in a jar — only without the stirring. We ask. It’s gone. I wonder if we give it out as quickly as it’s given to us.
  • God takes offenses seriously but holds them loosely. As the just Judge of all men, He doesn’t look the other way or pretend it didn’t happen. He confronted Peter in a powerful way for his cowardly denial. Once forgiven though, Jesus never mentioned it again. We would do everyone around us a tremendous service if we would do take the same approach with those who wrong us.
  • We must be quick to ask. Instead of rationalizing away our failures in defense of our foolish pride, let’s treat them with the urgency they deserve. We wouldn’t hang around with radioactive waste arguing about just how radioactive it might be. Well, most of us wouldn’t. Why dilly-dally while a far more pernicious but equally invisible evil eats away at our soul? Note the priority Jesus places on it:

Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.   (Matt. 5:23-24 NKJV)

Not even worship comes before our urgent need to forgive and seek forgiveness. Maybe it’s time we started un-complicating our lives by being like God — at least when it comes to forgiveness.

The rest of the mess might take us all a little time.

Do you find it easier to forgive those who offend you? What other truths have you found helpful to to ask for forgiveness before sin erodes our soul? Leave a comment here to share the growth.

What If God Wants Me to Fail?

September 10, 2012 in Devotional, Family, Life with 12 Comments

It’s one of those thoughts we all have even though we’re pretty sure we shouldn’t. When we step out of the boat, it’s not that we believe God can’t answer our prayers. But what if, for reasons known only to Him, he chooses not to. What if God wants me to fail?

Job boldly put it out there: “Though he slay me, yet will I trust Him.” (Job 13:15)  I really don’t want to die. I don’t want to fail. Yet the Bible is full of faithful believers called to suffer: Job, Paul, Peter, Stephen — and countless millions of martyrs throughout history.

Now that I’m out of the boat, what if He chooses to let me drown for His greater glory? Will I be OK with that?

Would you?

There Is No Faith without the Risk of Failure

As most readers know, we’ve recently stepped out of the boat and into the unknown as we seek to build a life of ministry helping people grow by connecting real life with real faith.

It’s scary stuff. I start out pretty boldly each morning. But usually by lunch time, I’m feeling that anxious war within. And the one question that continues to nag at our souls as we pray for God to be glorified is this: I know He can but that doesn’t mean He will. After all, what makes me any better than all those other more faithful ones who perished in His service.

Now before some of you accuse me of being morose or depressed, we should also acknowledge the bountiful promises of God:

  • My God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.   (Phil. 4:19)
  • Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.  But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.   (Matthew 6:31-33)
  • Whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them. (Matthew 11:24)

Both messages come from Scripture. God is good. Always. And sometimes he chooses to let us fail. So we’re left to reconcile these two as best we can. We pray boldly while we prepare our hearts for His sovereign answers.

A Few Tips to Keep Our Focus

Here are a few steps I’ve found while on this faith journey. Maybe they can be of help to you:

  • Seek God’s Glory Alone. It’s only when we truly desire His best that we can truly say, “He gives and takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.”  When we reach that place of humility before Him, one is truly just as acceptable as the other. I’m not saying I have arrived, just that we should all be trying to get there.
  • Ask in Faith without Doubting. Why? We’re told to do it. ”Let him ask in faith, with no doubting.” (James 1:6)  The asking is our task. The answering is God’s. All too often we assume his role in the process then wonder why we feel overwhelmed. We forget too quickly that it is God’s glory on the line — not ours — when His people are in need.
  • Pray Big Prayers. My friend P. Andrew Sandlin keeps reminding me of this need, though I confess I struggle to understand all it means. I know it means to go boldly before the throne of grace and “claim the crown, through Christ, my own.” But it also means my prayers must be about the Big Kingdom picture and not just about my petty needs.
  • Train Yourself to Surrender. Paul warns us that we’ll get a good workout becoming godly. He wasn’t kidding. Often it’s laying down our own pride that takes the most diligent effort. Start by making it a morning habit to crucify yourself, take up your cross, and follow.
  • Ever Be Willing to Answer “Yes.” What if He does chooses to let you fail, will you still trust Him? That is the question He wants answered. Do you trust Him enough to lay your future on the altar and lift the knife in obedience to Him? What if he doesn’t provide a substitute? When the temptation comes to draw back in fear — for that is what it is — will you hold to who He is or flee to who you think you are?

I wonder sometimes if Abraham told Sara about God’s call to sacrifice Isaac — the future of their family. If he did, how did she handle it? I tend to think he kept it to himself. I understand why. It’s hard to let God strip us of who we think we are. But it’s only through the testing that we become as gold. The fires of faith make us jewels fit for the King. There is no other way to be found worthy of the high calling that is in Christ Jesus.

Maybe you’re trying to do too much. Stand down. And watch God step up — or not. It’s His glory. It’s His world. It’s His call.

And we must be OK with that.

Lest that stark reality tempt you to lose heart:

The eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart is loyal to Him. (2 Chron. 16:9 NKJV)

God is constantly on the prowl for the chance to show His power on behalf of those who are willing to answer simply: “Yes.”

No matter what.

Do you ever struggle with the fear of following Christ into the unknown? What thoughts do you have about this tension that comes from surrendering yourself completely to the outcome of God’s choosing? Share your story or comment here to help us all grow.

photo by: The 5th Ape

How to Get Generous by Giving — Or Your Money Back!

September 6, 2012 in Family, Life, Personal Growth with 0 Comments

It’s probably just me. Lately I’ve come face-to-face with the reality of our family’s needs on this faith journey God has us on. I’ve given a lot of thought to generous giving. Mostly I’ve been focused on asking God to get generous and fill us up with His sweet treats – if only I could figure out the right way to shake the divine blessing machine. 

But as I study Scripture, I see again and again that God is more concerned about me getting more generous in my giving to help others. Like I said, it might just be me. Maybe you don’t struggle with this one.

Being generous in giving is another one of those counterintuitive truths captured in a gospel song I dimly recall from my childhood:

So give ’till you can’t give anymore,

Give Him more than you can afford,

And you’ll find your cup will overflow.

You just can’t out-give the Lord.

You Have to Give to Get

It’s when we have the greatest needs that we tend to shut the cupboards, get stingy with the peanut butter, and call it prudent planning. But God calls it foolish:

Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you. (Luke 6:38 ESV)

Cast your bread upon the waters, for you will find it after many days. (Eccl. 11:1 ESV)

And he called his disciples to him and said to them, “Truly, I say to you, this poor widow has put in more than all those who are contributing to the offering box. For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty has put in everything she had, all she had to live on.” (Mark 12:43-44 ESV)

How to Get Generous by Giving

How can we intentionally get more generous in our giving? Here are a few lessons I’m learning that might be of help:

  1. Practice the Art of Appreciation. It starts with changing my own mindset about just how good I have it. To be intentionally grateful is to sincerely thank God for my health, the cup of fresh water I’m drinking, the smiles on my children’s faces each morning, my wife’s cheerful perseverance in the face of the unknown, and even for the many toys that litter the floor.
  2. Let Go of God’s Stuff. We know it’s all His, of course, but…. It’s that long pause that proves my point. Be careful not to resist the Spirit’s urging to give His stuff to others. Just the other day, someone shared a need. We had the means to meet it. Before I could listen to the excuses piling up in my head, I offered to give. “Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it.” (Prov. 3:27 ESV)
  3. Seek Ways to Give More Generously. It’s obvious. Maybe that’s why we miss it. Look for ways to give God’s stuff away. It might not always be money — although that gift shouldn’t scare us either. Time, energy, and other resources are just as necessary. A friend stopped by just this morning for fresh veggies from our garden. Go ahead. Crunch on all the carrots you want. He’ll make more.
  4. Give Beyond Your Comfort Zone.  Faith hurts. If it feels comfortable, it’s likely not faith. Not yet. Faith isn’t faith until it’s tested (Pretty sure I got that from my friend Doug Carter). Believe me, I’ve been there many times and assured myself that I had given all I could. Now God is teaching me to embrace what John Piper calls a simpler “wartime lifestyle” to engage Kingdom conflict.
  5. Give Expecting Nothing in Return. God warns us that He eagerly waits to bless us beyond our imaginations — if we will but wait on Him and not try to manipulate His will for our ends.  (Ps. 81) Too often, we give generously to others with our other hand already extended toward God behind our backs. Give and walk away. When the Israelites tried to make their schemes work, God let them have what they wanted, but they lost what they could have had.

His ways are certainly not our ways. His thoughts are not our thoughts. Especially, when it comes to how we can get more generous in our own giving. As to that money-back guarantee? Try out-giving God. I double-dog dare you.

How would you rate your own willingness to be generous? What needs do you have that we can all pray for — or help meet? Leave a comment here to share the growth.

photo by: Brian Finifter

Teen Parenting Help: Guest Post from Shannon Milholland

August 30, 2012 in Uncategorized with 0 Comments

Today I am privileged to feature a guest post at Patheos by my friend Shannon Milholland. She’s an awesome writer, speaker, and author of Jesus & My Orange Juice. If you don’t follow her yet, you should.

Click here to read: Don’t Go Wireless with Your Teens

Do You Worship Your Next Paycheck?

August 29, 2012 in Family, Life, Personal Growth with 5 Comments

We worship what we fear. If it’s God, that’s a good thing. He should be feared. He’s God. But my own faith journey has forced me to ask myself a question that may be helpful for you. Do you worship your next paycheck?

Think about this statement: “I don’t know where my next paycheck is coming from.” Does it strike fear into your soul? Pity? Or joy at the possibility of amazing opportunity?

I found myself making that statement to myself this week, because, candidly, there is no next paycheck. I have discovered what Shakespeare and most people would call “the undiscovered country from whose bourn no traveler returns….” Some of you — maybe all of you at some point — have been there before. In this period of sustained economic recession, you might be there now.

Consider the example of Paul, or Saul, as he was called at the time. God broke into his comfortable world on the road to Damascus. ”Saul, whoever or whatever you think you’re worshipping, it’s not me.”

In a moment, Paul lost everything he had known — everything he had devoted himself to worship — including his next paycheck. But what a story he was freed to tell! The kind of story that turns the world upside down. (Acts 22)

What’s my story?

I confess that the fear — dare I say worship – of the next paycheck kept me transfixed in awe for far too long. If you’ve seen the action flick Cowboys and Aliens, think of the hypnotic gaze on the face of the captives. You’ll get the idea (Don’t look at the light!). If not, think of one of those bug-zapping gizmos, and you’ll end up with the same mental image. The thought of losing the perceived security of that next paycheck mesmerized me into staying in the boat.

What has made this faith journey especially difficult is that I’ve only had three jobs in my nearly twenty-five years of being in the workforce. (Unless you count my paper route. Do they still have those anymore?) When I commit to a direction, I tend to stick with it. I suppose that bodes well for my new direction. But it does make for a rather uncomfortable place.

Walking away from that next paycheck has forced me to deal with my own fears and inner demons through those legendary dark nights of the soul. And it still continues now as I face that reality within a matter of days. But as Steven Pressfield says in Turning Pro: Tap Your Inner Power and Create Your Life’s Work, reality and humility are two powerful forces. Gifts, really. When those two are present, all that is lacking is the will to move forward in answer to the call.

Walking by Faith

It’s one thing to say you will walk by faith when you’re pretty certain the next paycheck is coming. When you know it’s not, you come face-to-face with what you fear — and what you worship. You’re forced to choose.

No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money. (Matthew 6:24)

It is in uncertainty that we can finally embrace the adventure to worship Him who is our true security:

Most of us will have no idea where we are going most of the time. And I know that is unsettling. But circumstantial uncertainty also goes by another name: Adventure. ~ Mark Batterson, Wild Goose Chase: Reclaim the Adventure of Pursuing God

What about you? If you didn’t care about your next paycheck, what would you be free to do? Listen closely to the answer you give to that question. Maybe it’s God speaking through the fog of the ordinary to call you to something extraordinary.

Now focus on a strategy for getting to that place where you no longer worship that next paycheck.

I’ll be here. Waiting.

Go ahead. Dream. We won’t tell.  What would you be free to do if you no longer feared your next paycheck? Share your dreams with a comment here to inspire us all to grow.

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photo by: menj

Are You Sinning and Don’t Know It?

August 27, 2012 in Devotional, Personal Growth with 2 Comments

Stop what you’re doing! Set down that cinnamon-crunch bagel! Step away from that stapler! I hate to be the one to tell you this, but there’s a good chance you’re sinning right now and don’t even know it.

photo: TMAB2003

I’m not saying you’re checking your inbox or browsing the blogosphere while adjusting your ski mask for the next bank heist. If you are, good luck with that. I’m not even suggesting that you’re about to take yet another swig from that flask of Jim Beam you’ve got stashed under your desk.

I’m talking about the sins I struggle with most. The ones we never hear about. Not the things we do wrong, but the stuff we leave out.

Theologians say sin can take two different forms: “the sins of omission” and the “sins of commission.” Clever, but still using multi-syllabic words (oops, there’s another one). I’ve used a more basic definition for sin when teaching our kids: Doing the don’ts and don’ting the dos. Maybe that wasn’t much clearer for you, but the kids get it.

Sometimes the most serious sins are the things we know we should do, but don’t.

Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins. (James 4:17)

The Good I Could Be Doing

As I shared recently in this post at Patheos, my wife and I visited the Baja Peninsula of Mexico a few years ago on a short-term missions effort. One night, we trekked up into the mountains to a migrant worker camp in the middle of nowhere. We passed out clothing and Bibles, fed them hot dogs and nachos, and shared a film about Jesus. 

Afterwards,  as I sat under that wide and starry Mexican sky, I felt terrible. I knew I would leave and return home. They would still be trapped in a socialistic and corrupt political system tomorrow with only a used shirt and a few lingering crumbs of nachos to show for it.

Jeff Goins would say I had been wrecked. That’s not to say we shouldn’t do good in the short-term:

Love does not calculate that way. The good Samaritan did not say, “One interrupted day will make very little difference in the problem of chronic violence in this region.” He saw this one need and did something. ~ John Piper, A Hunger for God: Desiring God through Fasting and Prayer

Ideas Have Consequences.

The people living in poverty in that migrant worker camp — and countless millions of others — live in a prison made by ideas. As I sat alone with my thoughts that night, I had an epiphany. If I could use my gifts as a thinker and communicator to impact cultures, but choose not to do so — what is that?

Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins. (James 4:17)

If I know I can help someone, perhaps millions of someones, by putting my God-given strength of ideation to work, I can do good. If I don’t do it, I may be sinning and not even know it.

Am I Alone?

But I’m likely not the only one sinning unawares by doing nothing. What about you?

Search me, O God, and know my heart. (Ps. 139:23)

Where have you sensed the Spirit tugging you to act — while you’ve continued to sit. What strengths or talents are lying dormant in your desk drawer right next to that bottle of Jim Beam. Often our addictions help us conceal our true callings. And addictions don’t just come in the shape of a bottle.

If you’re like me, you have plenty of reasons to remain imprisoned in inactivity. And there will always be more readily available to justify our fearful disobedience. But we need to speak the truth to ourselves. We need to call it what it is: sin.

Maybe it’s time you stopped sinning and started using the gifts God has given you to help others. Maybe it’s time you chose to truly live by what you say you believe. Maybe that’s what faith is all about. And without faith — well, you can forget about being pleasing to your Creator.

Of course, it might take walking with a faith beyond your wildest imaginations and fears. But that’s OK. That’s where God hangs out.

See you there.

The promises of God should shatter fear. ~ John Piper

What dreams has God put in your heart that you would love to pursue if only you could find a way? What one thing is stopping you from answering the call? Share a comment with a click here.

How to Know When It’s Time to Go

August 24, 2012 in Leadership, Personal Growth with 0 Comments

I’m privileged to have a guest post appear today on the blog of church planter and leader Ron Edmondsen. I admire his leadership insights and recommend following his blog for a steady dose of wisdom. The advice I share there comes from my six months of intensive wrestling with the question:

How do I know that it’s time to step away from a good calling to pursue what I believe could be great one?

Click here to read the post: 5 Questions to Discern a Life Change 

For the intriguing back-story of my faith journey, click here to read: I Will Take the Ring: Why I’m Leaving Rivendell

Subscribe for my free e-book! Subscribe via e-mail to the right for regular helps to live real life with faith AND get my latest e-book now nearly complete. Finding the Curve: The Secret to Explosive Personal Growth will be absolutely free to all e-mail subscribers.

You Too Can Choose to Live by Faith. Let Me Help.

August 24, 2012 in Personal Growth with 0 Comments

I do some of my best thinking when I’m cutting the grass. I don’t know why. There’s something about taking the John Deere for a few turns around a few acres of green stuff that helps me put my thoughts into neat rows.

Tonight was no exception. As I rounded one corner near the rear of the turf course, I looked towards our house and saw it glowing, framed by the golden sun dipping low on the horizon behind it.

It wasn’t long ago that same house glowed for a different reason. It had a shine to it somewhere within my soul.

Not because it’s a grand palace. It’s not. Oh, it’s a great house. Surrounded by a “prettyish sort of wilderness” and some pretty cool gardens that I’ve nearly killed myself to plant. We love living here. I truly appreciate it.  

But it’s just a house.

My house had come to represent comfort, security, and confidence. But that was before God stirred my heart to truly live by faith. It began with — well, a feeling;

It started out as a feeling

Which then grew into a hope

Which then turned into a quiet thought

 Which then turned into a quiet word

And then that word grew louder and louder

‘Til it was a battle cry (lyrics from “The Call” by Regina Spektor)

In my case, the feeling turned into a book proposal on what it truly means to live each moment of life with real faith. Which then turned into an unshakeable desire to enter the story myself, to find out what would happen if I chose to live by what I believed to be true instead of by what I saw around me. And then that call grew louder and louder to put my confidence where it belonged instead of in stuff that won’t survive this century.

God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear…. (Ps. 46:1-2)

Sounds like a battle cry to me. Now I have to rewrite the book proposal with my own story currently in progress.

God is my confidence. And fear is a choice.

I can choose to fear or not to fear. If I believe the truth claim (God is our refuge), I will act as if that claim is true. If I don’t believe it – deep in my soul — I will not act as if it is true. It’s that simple.

Occasionally in life, we get rare moments when we can recognize significant shifts in our own thinking. I had one  about six months ago when I chose to get out of the boat and follow God’s call to use my strengths no matter the cost.

I think I’ve had another one tonight as I cut the grass – a clarifying vision of my calling.

In short, I want to help you choose to live by faith. I want to teach you how to do it, equip you to act on it, and encourage you to keep moving forward on this exhilarating faith journey. (Come to think of it, I might want to cut this post out and put it in a scrapbook.) Most importantly, I want to lead the way by my own example.

I choose to put my confidence in God, to live by faith no matter if I have a house that glows in the fading sunlight or not. But I don’t want to go alone.  I’ll take the ring, but I’d prefer a fellowship. I’d much rather encourage others to come along on this walk of faith. Starting with you. 

It’s time to change the world. It’s time to live by faith. Houses may get left behind. Shadow callings might be abandoned. No doubt we’ll face more than a few fears along the way.

Anyone else shaking yet? Just checking. I’m hoping I’m not the only one.

What does it mean to you to walk by faith? Do you act on what you say you believe? Go ahead. Leave whatever comment God is nudging you to share with a click here.

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photo by: AdamKR

Do You Teach Your Kids to Do Hard Things?

August 22, 2012 in Family, Parenting with 5 Comments

When I came home tonight, my kids excitedly shared what they’d been up to all day – designing and then practicing on a ninja exercise course! 

They shared their breathless story of how difficult it had been both to think up and then execute the tough assignment. Apparently, they all took turns repeatedly crossing from swing-to-swing over gaping crocodiles, scaling the slippery pole of certain death, and plunging down the scary slide with reckless abandon!

Again and again. It also explained where all the spaghetti went at dinner.

It reminded me how important it is to teach kids to do hard things.

We parents tend to foolishly think that our job is to make life easy for our kids. Or make it safe. I suppose it is if we want them to learn that life is easy. But is it?

For anything worth having, one must pay the price.  ~ John Burroughs

I suppose that’s partly why we chose to read The Lord of the Rings as our story for family reading time. I’ve blogged about why you should read to your kids and how we have found ways to read to them and enjoy it. One of the reasons we chose to tackle the 1,000 page LOTR by Tolkien with six kids between the ages of 4 and 11 was to teach them — and us — to do hard things.

Instead of running from the challenge, we tackled it head on.

I recall my teacher and mentor from my high school years reminding me often that the brain is a muscle. It will grow if you exercise it. I told my first students the same thing on the first day of school so mnay years ago. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that all four of our older kids are now tackling tougher reads all on their own.

And judging from the creative workout they’re getting on the playground, our strategy for cultivating greatness seems to be working.

Do you agree that we should teach children to tackle the tough stuff? What ways have you found to teach your kids to do hard things? Share a comment with a click here to share the growth.

 

How to Read to Your Children and Enjoy It

August 20, 2012 in Family, Parenting with 12 Comments

Yes, it is possible. You can read to your children and enjoy it — all of you. My post on Why You Should Read to Your Children gave a few reasons for making it part of your family routine. But that doesn’t mean it’s always been easy for us to float away on imagination bubbles.

At first we failed miserably. I thought the children — ranging in ages from 2-9 at the time — would sit like angels and listen to me regale them with classic tales from C.S. Lewis. They did. For about five minutes.

Somewhere in the never-ending back story at the beginning of Prince Caspian, they faded out one-by one. Soon the family-bonding time turned into a frustrated fit of anger from — well, me. And it was “off to bed!”

I even used our regular family meeting table (a square one that seats all eight of us) as the reading spot so we could all be gathered around facing one another. A couple of children did actually stay focused. Not surprisingly, they were the ones who naturally gravitated toward words.  The others? Well, let’s just say they were polite — but easily distracted.

I am happy to say, we’ve learned a few tricks to improve our family reading time. It’s no longer something we dread. In fact, the children moan if we miss it! And that’s in spite of the fact that we are reading through the unabridged version of — The Lord of the Rings trilogy by J.R.R. Tolkien.

That’s right — the whole thing.

A Few Key Steps

Here are a few key steps for reading to your children so you all enjoy it:

  • Choose a time. Children crave consistency. Let’s face it, we all do. If we don’t schedule it into our weekly routine, it probably won’t get done. Make it predictable so it doesn’t conflict with other priorities. For us, every Tuesday night for 30-40 minutes is our family reading time. Important reminder: Always leave them wanting more, not wishing you had ended twenty minutes ago.
  • Choose a place. We moved reading to the children from our family meeting table to the family room around the fireplace. Nothing like a fire to spark imagination in the winter. Everyone can still be more or less in a circle but each is free to relax a bit.
  • Choose an activity. I know this seems counterintuitive to have them doing something while we read, but our breakthrough came when I decided to seek synergy in the reading time. We purchased a sketch book and colored pencils for each child. We gave them their own “creative tub” in which to keep them. It’s only for family reading time. While Dad reads, each child must first sit silently for a few minutes. Once the imagination wheels start to turn, they are free to create whatever their minds conjure up. It doesn’t have to connect with the story. Their hands stay busy while their minds stay active. And both activities together grow their imaginations.
  • Choose a story. Don’t start with an encyclopedia or even cool gardening books if that’s your thing. Everyone loves stories. Choose stories that will interest them. But be sure to be a parent, as well. Pick tales that will put meat on the bones of their soul. That doesn’t mean you can’t toss in short, fun readings from time to time. In fact, you may want to have each of the children take a turn offering a short story or book to give them more buy-in into the process.
  • Choose a voice. Make it a fun time for all of you by doing your best to find unique voices for each character. Believe me, it’s hard to keep track of them all in LOTR – but still fun. (Gimli still makes my throat tickle a bit too much, but Gandalf is a fun one.) Remember, you are training their imaginations by modeling how to read. No pressure.

I’ll post later on why we chose Lord of the Rings. You should  choose what works for your family. I’d suggest making a “short list” of books you think might work and then discussing them with your children. Try to reach a consensus – and maybe a compromise — to get things rolling with their support. If your children are much younger, of course, any Dr. Seuss or similar tale will do the job.

How do you read to your children? What tips and trick do you use — or did your parents use with you — to create lasting family memories? Share a comment with a click here.

photo by: h.koppdelaney

My Review of The Odd Life of Timothy Green

August 17, 2012 in Family with 0 Comments

My review of The Odd Life of Timothy Green is up at Patheos. 

Take some tissues. But note my caution about taking the kids.

 

Don’t forget: Subscribe by e-mail by Saturday at midnight and you could win one of the five copies of Wrecked by Jeff Goins!

I Will Take the Ring: Why I’m Leaving Rivendell

August 15, 2012 in Family, Leadership, Life with 12 Comments

“I will take it. I will take the ring.”

So said the fabled hobbit Frodo of Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings trilogy after sensing the irresistible calling to attempt what seemed impossible to all.

With those fateful words, he began a new chapter in his journey – a quest that defied logic, surpassed all imaginations, and grew a faith in him he never knew he had.

And it all started with leaving the safety of the elvish haven of Rivendell.

It is a dangerous business going out your front door. ~ J. R. R. Tolkien

Today, I announce what God has been inwardly calling me to do for some time.

Today, I proclaim with as much faith as a I can muster: “I will take it, God. I will take your call and follow wherever it may lead.”

Today, I share why I am leaving Rivendell.

Why I Must Go

It has been my privilege to serve as part of a noble Kingdom quest these last dozen years as part of the stellar team at Cornerstone Christian Academy. It has been a rewarding experience beyond what words can express. I have formed friendships and bonds that I pray will transcend these earthly days. I’ve grown exponentially — because that’s what people do at Cornerstone. 

Hopefully, along the way, I’ve been able to help others grow in their faith journey, as well. But God has called me to step out by faith in a new direction.

I don’t want to leave Rivendell. Not really.

But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us. ~ (Gandalf) The Lord of the Rings

Cornerstone is truly an enchanting place where life-transforming discipleship takes place for God’s Kingdom. If you’re a parent anywhere near Cleveland, Ohio, you should click here to get the number for the school and beg them to let you enroll your children.

I am leaving what most would perceive as a safe, comfortable position as the principal of a blessed and successful Christian school, a ministry doing truly amazing work to make disciples who make disciples for Christ.

At Cornerstone, it has been my privilege to have a key hand in guiding curriculum and discipleship development that intentionally cultivates a Biblical world and life view — connecting real life with real faith.

Cornerstone’s synergistic partnership with my friend Hugh Hewitt on  In, But Not Of Revised & Updated: A Guide to Christian Ambition and the Desire to Influence the World is just one example of how we have been intentional about equipping students to thrive while finding and following God’s unique call for their lives.

It was my privilege both to develop the study guide for that book based on years of teaching the content at Cornerstone and to write the Forward for it. 

A Word to the Critics

Now, I know how people are. If someone leaves anywhere — a church, a community position, their seat in the theater — we immediately make assumptions about their reasons for doing so.  And because silence speaks, as I wrote here, we inevitably fill in the blanks with our own fears and insecurities. 

So let me be clear: the school I am leaving has nothing to do with my decision to go. Well, maybe a little, but in a different way than you might suspect.

Because it truly is a dynamic place where authentic Kingdom growth happens everyday — the Rivendell of ministries — my decision was an excruciating one. It would have been much easier if the ministry I had poured my life into for the last dozen years was ineffective and failing. It’s not. It’s growing and thriving under superb leadership.

God’s Irresistable Calling

My decision is all about the irresistible call to better steward my God-given gifts of writing, thinking, speaking, and leading change to help people grow by connecting real life with real faith. That’s it. There’s nothing else to the story.

After much counsel and prayerful reflection, I decided to step up and amid the noisy commotion of a fallen world, answer simply, “I’ll take it.”

You can read more about the story of my internal journey here as God wrecked my comfortable plans with His call.

I confess it seems strange that God would choose me, poor hobbit that I am, to step out into a big world threatened by such deep and encroaching darkness. But it is His world. And I am His. So I must answer His call.

I have chosen to step out of my comfort zone to serve God’s work on a broader scale – to build and then speak from a wider platform that expands the borders of the Kingdom of heaven here on earth.

The Road Goes On and Ever On

We have chosen to get out of the good and comfortable land and obey God’s call – not really knowing where the journey will take us. We’ve got the general purpose clear but the specific path is, at this point, unknown. What roads we will take, where we will stop along the way, who we will meet, what we will eat — I think our Lord said He had all that covered. So we will not fear.

I say we, of course, because my amazing wife (her name is Faith for a reason) and six children are part of the fellowship on this journey — quest — thing. We’ve included our children in this because we believe they need to see the mighty hand of God at work as we answer His call by faith — with nothing wavering.

An Invitation to Join the Fellowship

I consider this calling to write, think, and speak of real life and real faith faith as a sacred quest. My prayer is that it not dwindle to just two, as Frodo’s did, but that it grow and continually expand as many more join who believe in the transforming power of Biblical ideas applied to real life. I invite you to join our community. Be part of the fellowship of this calling.

I know we’ll see splendid vistas we never dreamed existed back in the Shire. I know there’ll be dark days when the walls of Mordor loom before us. Perhaps some grotesque creatures will emerge to test our faith. But along the way, I hope we’ll become friends. Recall that the one who grew the most through Frodo’s quest was not Frodo, but Sam — the friend who came along to support.

Already God has opened doors for the vision to move forward. I blog about faith and culture at Patheos, the leading Internet destination for religious thought that reaches millions each month. I’ve been invited to write and think as a scholar with the Center for Cultural Leadership, an opportunity that requires God to raise support for His calling on my life. I’ve partnered with John Maxwell’s Equip Leadership team to train leaders in Guam.

Several e-books are in the works — well, let’s just say there’s never shortage of ideas. And I am always open to connecting with other Kingdom opportunities to create further synergy for Christ.

Join the Journey

But only if it will draw you closer to your own faith in God. If you sense the Spirit urging you to come along, come. I look forward to connecting with you on the journey. If I can help you in any way, please don’t hesitate to let me know. 

Here’s how you can be part this fellowship:

  1.  Pray. If you do nothing else, it will be enough. “Prayer is the hand that moves the hand of God,” said E.M. Bounds.  Pray that God will be glorified beyond what we can ask or imagine. Pray big prayers. We are. Both for us and the school where God is at work.
  2. Subscribe. It will be easy to pass over this request — but it is huge! Subscribe to this blog for practical helps to live real life with real faith and to my Patheos blog on faith and cultural issues. From a human standpoint, the greatest enemy of effective influence is obscurity. Good stuff just gets crowded out by our noisy culture. If you will commit to helping spread what I write, it will help immensely. It’ll only take your entering your e-mail address in the upper right of this page and then a click or two each day to share. You can start sharing now by passing along this post with some of the social media buttons below.
  3. Speaking. I love to teach. Check out my speaking page which will be growing in the coming days. If you think I might be a good fit at your church, school, retreat, special event, or international conference — or know someone who might have an opening — drop me a note through that page.
  4. Money. Yes, Kingdom work requires kingdom resources. I’m not concerned about it, because I’m confident of God’s calling on my life. It’s my privilege to offer you the opportunity to turn earthly treasure into heavenly gain in two ways in particular:
  • Support my mission to train leaders with John Maxwell’s Equip Leadership team in Guam. Click here to find out more. Your one-time or regular support will help equip leaders on the other side of the world. Talk about impact!
  • Support my calling to write, think, and speak as a scholar with the Center for Cultural Leadership. Through this on-going partnership, I will have the freedom to follow the Spirit’s lead in using my gifts while partnering with other like-minded thinkers and writers connecting real life with real faith. And you’re support will be tax-deductible. For now, if you think God may be positioning you to be blessed by supporting the calling in this way, just drop me an e-mail with CCL in the subject line. We’ll talk.

Look for my new e-book Finding the Curve: The Secret to Explosive Personal Growth in the coming weeks.  I’ll be giving it away free — yes, free — to all e-mail subscribers.

See. It pays to subscribe. Just put your e-mail in the box in the upper right.

Update: Tune in to The Word 101.5 FM in Pittsburgh, Friday, August 17, at 5:10 PM. I’ll be rejoining John and Kathy during their excellent afternoon drive show to talk about this faith journey and “How To Know When It’s Time to Go.” (Additional media connections welcome.)

By the way, I’ll still be around at the school for a season and will be doing all I can to ensure an effective transition takes place.

If you have any questions or comments that are not of a personal nature, leave a comment with click here . Otherwise send an e-mail directly to me at Bill@BillintheBlank.com.

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